No, not the other type of friends with benefits, but rather friends who truly benefit you throughout life.

Throughout my life I’ve been blessed with friends ranging from pure acquaintances to the would die for variety.

Although most of them I would help out without a second thought, very few (less than a dozen) truly benefit me (as in help improve my life).

I’m not sure whether it’s the state of the economy, the dismal political choices, or the immense loneliness that is apparently blanketing the planet, but it seems as if people view me as an ATM; a place to make withdrawals but no deposits.

It’s become so straining that I’ve begun publicly expressing apathy towards various individuals, ignoring their plights for help and refusing to hangout (or even hang around) with them as I’m tired of having my strength and emotions exhausted on their behalf.

This probably doesn’t make the greatest friend in the world, but I wish for once people would get over their doubts, fears, depression, etc., and resolve their own recurring issues without my input.

The world isn’t going to hell in a hand basket, and for once I’d like to be inspired by select friends overcoming their issues (instead of vice versa) and look at life as a challenge full of obstacles instead of a dungeon full of beatings.

Let’s inspire each other towards success instead of wallowing in despair. Oh, and I wouldn’t mind if people threw their skin in the game from time to time, as it would help benefit me (and ease the load).

Solomon’s words of wisdom ring true today as they did thousands of years ago.

Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.

~Proverbs 4:23

I think my biggest problem is that I’m too open hearted, which results in me exposing myself to the wrong people who in hindsight do not have my best interests in mind (and end up causing me unnecessary grief).

I need to be more selective when it comes to personal friendships lest I end up receiving another heartache.

In essence I need to begin focusing on myself and less on distractions. Starting tonight….or maybe tomorrow (as it’s late right now).

–Posted from my iPhone

I love dogs! Why? Because no matter whether you’re having a great day, a horrible day, or anything in between they are always excited to see you (provided they know you and don’t bite you that is).

Cats on the other hand are (from my experience) different. If you are able to win their affection they may or may not display it in public, giving you the cold shoulder as soon as you see them.

I think friends generally fall into one of these two categories. You have some who publicly enjoy seeing you in person, and the small minority who truly enjoy your presence, but not in public.

Or as I like to say Dog People and Cat People. I’m not sure why I spend so much energy investing myself into Cat People, but honestly it’s becoming a draining experience.

And it’s something that I hope changes in the future. Soon…

Image Credit: Nickelodeon

(Image Courtesy of Emmaru)

It looks like I’ll be entering a new season in life. I won’t go into details publically here (that’s what private posts are for!!) but let’s just say 2010 will be a defining moment in my life.

Personally I feel like everything about me is being sifted and shifted, and my faith in various institutions is turning into ash while my faith in a few friendships is being tested to the extreme (in a good way I hope!).

Well, that is it thus far. I’m looking forward to the future, whatever it may bring!

“What is Love?”
(Is a question I once asked)
“Is it a gift from above?
Is it an action or a task?

Can you enlighten my mind,
To this strange emotion?
That makes cold hearts kind
And full of devotion

To the significant other
Whom you deeply admire
And try not to smother
With your passionate desire

Some say love isn’t real
That’s it’s all just in your head
But if that’s truly the deal
Then one is better off dead

For the mind is very fickle
Despite it’s thirst for knowledge
It’s worth is about a Nickle
After one finishes college

Love is not an action
For all actions have an end
And lack the satisfaction
Of a trust worthy friend

Love is not an emotion
For emotions are irrelevant
Ever changing with commotion
Going from wrath to benevolent

What is love? Can you tell me?
Can you find its definiton?”
This question I asked Amy
Who provided this explanation

“Love is kind, love is strong,
And provides no tally of wrongs
It’s forgiving and accepting
And it’s never, ever rejecting

Full of grace and full of mercy
But it’s also willing to hurt thee
To bring truth into your ears
Despite the future tears

It foolishly places it’s trust
And is willing to go bust
By revealing it’s greatest secret
Believing that you will keep it

Love is constant, it won’t fade
For it’s ultimately made
To last beyond a million days
Love is Forever and Always!”

I still asked more questions
But her answers remained the same
And despite my best intentions
I started to like this dame

And thus began the story
About Darnell and Amy
Two souls seeking out a journey
Together–for the rest of eternity.

Poem by Darnell Clayton

–Posted via iPhone

So right now it’s past 4 AM, and I am at the hospital with friends and Amy’s family.

Right now I think the doctor stepped in (unsure as they kicked everyone but one person out of the room) so I fully expect the baby to arrive sometime this morning (hopefully before 8 AM).

Everyone else in the waiting room went home except for Amy’s parents, her oldest sister and I (we’re roughing it for until he is born).

I’ve uploaded a bunch of photos to Facebook already, and will update everyone on her current status from within it ad well (as I am not using Twitter as Facebook is more private).

Also, some people have been asking me about my relationship with Amy, as well as Miles her son, so here is the “short & sweet” version which should help kill a few rumors that have been spreading

• Amy and I are friends right now, but I do plan on courting/dating her later on
• Yes, I do love Amy, and yes she is my first love (no joke)
• I am not the biological father of her son, Miles (& yes, I’m still a virgin)

If you have any other questions, feel free to ask me on:

• Twitter: @Darnell
• Friendfeed: Friendfeed.com/Darnell
• Facebook: Facebook.com/DarnellClayton

Alrighty, I’m going to try to get 1 hour of sleep before Miles greets the world, so text me if want extra info peeps.

–Posted via iPhone

I don’t get it. Perhaps its just that I’m Sanguine or something, but people really need to look on the bright side of life.

After all, you’re not dead, and there are far worse things in life.

People seem to be way too depressed about politics, religion, the environment, being single, or some future war that’s going to wipe us all out.

Aside from the dating status, the rest is (mostly) beyond your control, so people should stop worrying about it.

And if you can’t stop worrying about it, then find someone who can solve your problem.

I don’t want to sound harsh, but there are more important things to worry about in life–like friends, family, and evil cats (I’m just joking my feline loving friends).

Speaking of which, here is a video about these hairballs that will hopefully cheer up some of my depressed friends from planet Earth.

Our cooking fire. Heh.

Well, today I just discovered why time management is important. And why I need to upload more of my life on Google’s servers (this time via Google Calendar).

Basically, I contacted a friend and let him know that I would be getting in touch with him later on today this evening.

Ironically, I discovered an event at church that is happening around the same time (give or take an hour). Although I have not committed to the event, everyone is probably expecting me to be there because I attended the same event last year.

And to make matters worse, one of the church members emailed me to make sure that I am wearing red (I think it’s a theme or something, although I hope it has nothing to do with star trek).

I may be able to make the opening ceremonies, but I am definitely going to have to miss the dinner. I’ll probably get some flack for it via MySpace (that is if I both check it next week) but that would be better than disappointing my friend.

It almost seems like every personal blog I come across (at least with friends) is either depressing, semi-depressed, or uber-geekified like me (hey, at least they are happy).

Is the world really that bad?